I've been getting just plain sick of a lot of things. People lying to me, behind my back, or straight to my face. Seeing no difference made on this planet, in this wonderful country USA. Music may be sounding good still under some circumstances, but it's all about competition and is never original. Missing certain people who loved me, dead or alive. Dealing everyday with the same old patterns. Realizing that it will always be like this from now on. Facing the truth, the past continuously. Being confused almost all of the time. My dreams now becoming meaningless and no longer symbolic. Scared of what I'll be capable of tomorrow. When a guy is actually interested me, he is either nowadays 40+ or from some foreign country trying to trick me into white slavery on MySpace. Finding no self-esteem in myself. Looking in the mirror, and wanting to die. Not willing to do what I should've done weeks, months, years ago. Always wanting to eat, thinking it's the solution. Just sick. And it's frightening to figure out in the end that I will never be truly happy. I don't know if I should trust anyone, including my own mother. If I should rely on this crummy town I live in as a security. Or listen to all that music that's "in" isn't relaly worth-while. Get over the ones who don't care about me anymore. Grow up. Or maybe not rely on only men to fulfill my life. Just take control of my life. I know one day I can change, but unfortunately the rest of this world won't. That is something I'm sick of most. Because no matter how hard we supposedly try, nothing is done.